I am finally after many many years of ever exercising under eating vegan hell i am choosing recovery with the help of a wonderful therapist and support team. This site is amazing and i have followed Swigg for years and recently started binge listening to and watching Tabitha Farraar who i am really enjoying. I am conquering a few fear foods and releasing the gym obsession however i cannot stop calorie counting. I have no idea how to eat without those numbers. I always try to keep to 1300 however yesterday i hit over 2000 and the guilt i feel is so extreme. Guilt because i am still hungry and can only imagine how much i would overshoot if i wasnt counting. How on earth do people eat and not count? How do they stay a standard size. I want out of this mental prison so badly but just cannot stop. My Fitness Pal was such a bad idea for me and i just cannot release it. How did you overcome this if it was something you did? I would appreciate anything you could offer.