From skwigg's journal:
You're never back at square one. Even though it may feel like you're repeating old behaviors, you're doing it with more insights, knowledge, and support each time. The behaviors may seem the same, but you're different. This is how we recover.
It won't always be this way. We tend to think that whatever we're experiencing today is our permanent state. It's not! Change is inevitable.
Honesty is the best policy, with yourself and others. Eating disorders thrive on shame, secrecy, isolation, and denial. Take those away and it doesn't have anywhere to hide. Share what's happening with those close to you, with us, with your therapist. Own your choices. You get to choose what you do and how you feel about it, even mid-binge, even if you DO repeat the same unwanted behavior. How you think about the situation is up to you. A new perspective changes everything. Realize that this a faulty coping mechanism + physiology, not a moral issue or a character flaw. Approach it with curiosity and kindness. Eating disorders come unraveled when the judgment and punishment aren't there to keep the cycle rolling.