Can you visualize (and then maybe write or verbalize if it helps) what your life would be like without the food and weight fear? Imagine it’s totally gone. You are fully recovered. How is your day different? What’s the first thing you do in the morning? What’s for breakfast if there are no worries about doing it wrong? How do you interact with your family? What do you have planned today? What do you look forward to? How does it feel physically and emotionally to be completely rested and relaxed? If you have no fear and anxiety, how would you enjoy your time at home alone? How would you spend time with your family and friends? Are there fun activities, hobbies, or outings? What’s for dinner? How is that different now that you’re calm and confident in your choices? What do you do after dinner? How does that feel?
I ask because you have to SEE this life before you can step into it. Create the whole thing in your mind. Imagine it’s a done deal, fully recovered, happy, rested, comfortable in your body, confident in your choices. What are you doing differently? What are your thoughts like? The more fully and frequently you can imagine it, the more it changes your brain to be that. The easier it becomes to take those steps and think those thoughts in your daily life.
If you focus on everything you’re afraid of, everything that could go wrong, what you don’t want, then that’s your experience. It’s ALL you can experience.
As children, most of us had vivid imaginations. We were great at pretend. That is a super important skill for brain development - seeing yourself trying new things, succeeding, being the hero. Kids play at that and it helps them grow up. Well, adults can imagine and grow too. If you’re too scared to try something beneficial, imagine you’re Super You. What is she willing to try that you’re not? If you’re just playing, it doesn’t have any dire implications to skip the run today and go meet a friend at a coffee shop instead. That’s your mission, or whatever you decide is your pretend, funny, no pressure mission today. That’s how you change, not by shuffling negative scenarios in your head until you’re too paralyzed to act.