I was thinking about how my take on food, health, and fitness has evolved. There are no absolutes anymore, no fear, no guilt. There's not a big story where eating one thing can be my downfall, or where not eating certain foods defines me. I considered this as it pertains to peanut butter. As a mostly-plant eater, I like foods that add flavor and boost the protein in my diet, so I have a jar of organic peanut butter powder. I also like actual peanut butter and have four jars of Skippy. I also have peanut butter ice cream and Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkins. 🎃 If you take a diet mindset, buying powdered peanut butter means the real stuff is "bad" and you're being virtuous by avoiding it. If you take a whole-food, unprocessed stance, you'd have to just stick with peanuts. Smashing them up with sugar and salt is dangerous and wrong. If you're in the no-diet-anything camp, it would be wrong to buy powdered peanut butter because it has fewer calories. It must mean you're restricting. I'm of the mindset that I want to be able to eat any of it. There are times when I want to increase protein in a meal, times when I want to swoon over candy, and times when I need something that will melt on hot toast. None of it defines or limits me. That is refreshing compared to trying to decide which way is right, and what my peanut butter choice says about me as a person.
I've been meditating most days. At first, the meditations with talking really annoyed me. Now, I'm liking some of the Deepak Chopra ones. One of my favorites lately has you meditate on this:
Every choice I make is a decision between happiness and resentments. I choose happiness. I give up being right.
Love that! In the moment, I rarely realize that I have a choice. Someone says something dumb or makes a demand of me and I'm stressed. They did it to me, the story goes. Or, this thing happened and now I will be upset and resentful. It wasn't the fault of the person or circumstance though, I was the one choosing resentments. If I stop it, I'm happier, and if I lose the need to "win" in these situations, I'm happier still. It's pretty cool!